❛ is it organiiiiiiiic?! ❜
❛ you’re a bitch. ❜
❛ a lot of people don’t know this about me, but i’m a snail. ❜
❛ oh my god, thaat looks — no, thaaaaaat — no, thaaaaaaaat — no! NO! ❜
❛ you’re not ugly, you’re just less prettier than everybody else. ❜
❛ [name here]! why is this orange juice not ORGANIC? ❜
❛ yeah, he was eatin’ my pussy like there was no tomor — ALL SHALL RISE FOR THE QUEEN! ❜
❛ BETCH! ❜
❛ aaaaaaaare the chips GLUTEN FREE?! ❜
❛ i’m sorry, i wasn’t listening to your stupid ass. ❜
❛ hey, guys! finally got my house fixed! last time, it burned down — ❜
❛ never — never tell anybody to EAT PIZZA. ❜
❛ what do you call a dog with no teeth? a toothless dog. ❜
❛ yo, what up mtv cribs! i’m [insert name], and i’m trash. ❜
❛ hey, girl, are you a tree? ‘cause i’m a tiny little FUCKING SQUIRREL TRYING TO GET MY NUT!!! ❜
❛ i love rap! it goes hard! ❜
❛ you’re not weird, you’re just… CREEPY AS SHIT! ❜
❛ I’M TRYING TO SLEEEEEEEEEEP! ❜
❛ i’m not loud and OBNOXIOUS! i just like to have FUN! ❜
❛ am i sick? yeah. sick of your shit. ❜
❛ i like to smoke wateeeeeeeeer! ❜
❛ did somebody just say gluten? ❜
❛ i don’t like citrus, ‘cause it’s too sour. ❜
❛ i don’t believe in superstition, because the only superstar in here is me! ❜
❛ i’m the illuminati princess. ❜
❛ sorry, i only have 5sos. ❜
❛ oh my goooooood! jennaaaaaaaaa! my nail is brokeeeeeeeeeeeen! ❜
❛ you shall not pass unless you suck my ass. ❜
❛ sorry, i’m gluten free. ❜
❛ hey, is this 411? what’s the number for 911? ❜
❛ shove a tomogachi up my ass and call me a squirrel face, ‘cause i’m looking good as fuck. ❜
❛ shut the FUCK up. ❜
❛ augh! what is that smell?! oh, i had no clue you were in here. ❜
❛ can you guys please keep it down? i’m listening to the bible. ❜
❛ oh! it’s blue and green. shut up! it’s a FUCKIN’ DRESS! ❜
❛ i don’t do drugs, i am drugs? ❜
❛ like six hours straight, two hours gay. ❜
❛ play my hood jam. ❜
❛ ESTABAN JULIO RICARDO MONTOYA DELEROSA! ❜
❛ MY FAVORITE FALL VEGETABLE IS A DICK! ❜
❛ mom, i’ll be right back, i gotta go kill someone. ❜
❛ hi, welcome to chilli’s! ❜
❛ oh, oh my god. you’re a capricorn? i — i’m sorry, i forgot to do the ritual. ❜
❛ no, honey, i know how to act. ❜
❛ is there anything to eat at my house? NOPE!! ❜
❛ YOU FUCKING BITCH! WHY WERE YOU TALKING TO ROBERT BEHIND MY BACK? ❜
❛ hey, you should turn around. it was hot in here until you walked in. ❜
❛ oh my god, did you hear that? it’s you being quiet for once! good job! ❜
❛ well, i’m 3% german, 4% french, 18% italian, 2% milk… ❜
❛ WHY THE FUCK IS THERE A GUITAR IN THE MICROWAVE?! ❜